February 9, 2005 Crack is Whack T-shirt and jeans. The historic uniform of the cool dude. Wear a T-shirt and jeans and never be mistaken for an IRS agent, a ladies shoe salesman or David Byrne. But for all the comfort and ease of this ensemble, it has its flaws. You're out in your T-shirt and jeans. You crouch to tie your shoe. You feel a breeze. It's flowing up your backside. It's flowing...down your backside. You turn to see if anybody has noticed what by this time you know to be true. You -- yes you -- have revealed your quarter slot. To an entire field-tripping 5th grade class. You absently tug downward at the back of your shirt. But you're up against something bigger than yourself. Your shirt has climbed north, your belt loops south, and never the twain shall meet. But one has to wonder how the assemblage of these two fashion staples came to be so iconic with such an obvious inherent flaw. Did James Dean expose his moon sliver when he hunched beside his Mercury Coupe in Rebel without a cause? Did Marlon Brando call out "Stella" so she could come down and rectify his posterior gap? Luckily, one company has identified the problem and done something about it. The Duluth trading company has created their very own "Longtail" T-shirt. The shirt has an extra 3 inches at the bottom to cloke your cleavage no matter how low your stoop goes. The Longtail comes in a variety of colors and -- to prevent another age-old problem -- has no scratchy tag at the neck. You'll feel the improvement -- from top to bottom. The Long Tail T-shirt is available at The Duluth Trading Company